I’ve spent many, many hours of my life wishing for something more than what I already have.
It’s that all-too-common thought process, I’m so thankful for the blessings in my life…but I would be so, so thankful if…
You know what I mean?
There’s always more. Or, rather, I thought there was more.
And now, I’m realizing…there may be more one day, but right now, I just want this.
I want this skinny little house in the city. I want to live in so small a space that I can never escape my family because why should I escape? I want to be a one-car family. I want to be at peace with being at home 90% of the time. I want to live on a small food budget. I want to stretch myself to become more creative with minimal ingredients because it’s simple and it’s fun. I want to spend most of my energy on chasing my boys around and nursing Forrest and cooking and cleaning. I want to stay up late and enjoy my husband and giggle when I wake up in the morning so exhausted that I can barely see straight, but oh coffee and then I wash my face with cold water and get ready to do it again!
I want this. I want this because this is what I was given. And it’s only my fault if I don’t choose to see the beauty where it truly lies: in the ordinary, in the everyday, in the plain, and in the simple.
My life. Beautiful. Right now. Not more – not yet. Just…right now.