Still Hanging In There

I’m 39 weeks pregnant today. How did that happen?

I don’t have a whole lot to report – my Braxton-Hicks contractions are still coming pretty infrequently and I declined a pelvic exam at my appointment yesterday because I just don’t see what difference it will make. Knowing if there’s “progress” might be nice, but I’m aware that women can go into labor whether they’re dilated or not – so why stress myself out with the whole idea of whether or not I’m “progressing?” I may find out next week, but I didn’t want to bother with it this week. I don’t see the point.

I feel so ready. My midwife said I “look ready.” I don’t know exactly what she means by that, but I hope she’s right! πŸ™‚

I’ve been experiencing this weird feeling of nausea for about a week now. It comes and goes, but I often feel it when I first wake up (sort of reminiscent of morning sickness) and then occasionally throughout the day. I don’t think it’s related to anything obvious, and it comes at all different times in many different situations. Have any of you ever experienced this in late pregnancy?

I’ve heard that many women have babies closer to a full moon. Tomorrow’s a full moon. Any thoughts on that theory? I don’t know what I make of it, really. I didn’t have Jack close to a full moon.

39wks

As far as the labor and birth, some plans have changed. As many of you know, I birthed Jack into the water. I loved that experience. It felt so wonderful to be immersed in warm water, and it really helped me when I could so easily sway through those intense transition contractions. After Jack’s arrival, I decided that there just wasn’t any other way I’d want to birth – water was it. When searching for a midwife this time around, I wanted to be sure she was capable of attending a waterbirth. The midwife I chose is, of course, and I’ve been looking forward to it since the beginning.

Unfortunately, due to some misunderstanding and miscommunication, we’ve now arrived at the end of the pregnancy and we were not aware that we were responsible for purchasing/renting the tub and all the supplies to go along with a birthing pool until only a couple of weeks ago. My midwife did say she’d be happy to let me labor and birth in our bathtub, but after taking a bath in it recently, I realized that I could never get comfortable enough to birth a baby in there. It’s a simple tub with no place to lay my head, and it’s rather small. It just won’t work.

For about a week, I tried to convince myself that there was still a way to have a waterbirth. I researched inexpensive “kiddie pools,” hoses, sink adaptors, etc, but I finally accepted the fact that I couldn’t afford to purchase everything in a reasonable amount of time. In my mind, I’d created this picture of how the house might look while I was laboring. I knew where I wanted the tub to go, I saw where I’d put candles, I’d decided how to best avoid waking Jack if I were to go into labor in the middle of the night…it was all “planned out.”Β 

In the midst of my frantic researching to keep the dream of a waterbirth alive, however, I realized that I needed to let go of any preconceived ideas and just move on. Β Many women don’t labor and birth in the water, and they still have beautiful experiences. I know this is true. I resolved to fully let go of the waterbirth this time around. I prayed that the Lord would help me to excitedly anticipate birthing Forrest in a way completely different from my experience with Jack. Since then, I’ve experienced a new joy as I imagine what it may look like. I’ve worked to make my bedroom as peaceful and clean as possible. I’ve begun to see it as a sort of haven. Although a “dry birth” isn’t what I’d hoped for, I’ll just be happy to birth a healthy baby and I’ll enjoy doing it in the comfort of my own bedroom.

I’d love to hear some of your birth stories. I’m just in that kind of mood! Feel free to share in the comments section, or blog about it on your site (and be sure to let me know you did so). πŸ™‚

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5 Comments

Filed under on being a mama, pregnancy, tea-timing

5 responses to “Still Hanging In There

  1. I’m sorry about the dreams of a home waterbirth, but you’ve got a terrific attitude! I’ll be so excited to hear all about your birth when the time comes. And kudos to you for not getting a vag exam! I didn’t get one until mid-labor (which still isn’t always a great idea) with my last baby. And none at all with babe #2.

    This isn’t my main blog, but I posted all 3 of my birth stories here: http://forbeautifulbeginnings.blogspot.com/ I always love birth stories, but I positively devour them when I’m getting toward the end of a pregnancy! πŸ™‚

  2. Hi Mama!

    You can still labor in that kiddie pool the old fashioned way: remove water by hand using the largest pots you have and add hot water heated in other pots on the stove. I’ve done that with a couple of waterbirths I supported. I even had to climb stairs to do so, mom labored in her bedroom upstairs and the kitchen is downstairs.

    Midwifery care can help keep us in shape! πŸ™‚

  3. Yay for you on declining the internal exam! I never had any with my 1st two babies until I was in labor– even when I went over 42 weeks with #2 (I was so determined to just let things happen as they would with her since I’d had a terribly long and arduous labor with #1 and I felt that not getting anxious at all would make a huge difference for me– and it did!) and I only had 1 with each of the following 2 babies, and then because my doctor was going out of town both those times and wanted to leave a detailed report with her covering physician (and also maybe because I’d moved from Pgh to rural NY by then and didn’t have the midwife options I’d had with the 1st two…). I hate them, and not because I find them uncomfortable (because I don’t honestly), but because both times I was almost 3cm dilated and 75%-80% effaced at 37 weeks, but of course it didn’t mean a thing! It’s all false hope anyway, right?!?! πŸ™‚

    I hope you can find great ways to relax without water. My second birth was the only one where I had a jacuzzi-sized tub for laboring (as opposed to a regular-sized tub) and it was the only time water helped. The first time I only had a shower and the third time I had a regular tub. I’m not gonna lie: they were definitely bad replacements! That said, I think being in a comfortable place, candles, music, etc. are all great ways to create a calming environment, too. I’m already looking forward to planning all sorts of various ways to help this next time around, especially since I think a peaceful birth will go a LONG way towards giving me the successful VBAC I want. So be sure and record for us all what did and didn’t work well afterward!

  4. You may have read mine when I first put it on my blog, but if not, here is the link: http://from-my-life.blogspot.com/2008/11/benjamins-birth-story-part-1.html

    I see in your sidebar, though, that Forrest has arrived so you may not have the time or the care to read anymore birth stories. Can’t wait to read yours!! Congratulations and many blessings!

  5. I see he is here, congratulations!! I hope your adjustment from 1 to 2 is going well and that you are getting some sleep. Can’t wait to see pictures!

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