These Days

These days, I am feeling rather nauseated. Wait – make that extremely nauseated. It’s strange because it comes and goes. I’ll feel fine, and then someone will talk about food, or Jack will want some cheese, and I stop dead in my tracks. “Food? Now? GROSS!” I know I need to eat. I know I’ll feel better if I eat. But nothing sounds good. I’ve forced myself to eat several times, and afterwards, I feel seriously concerned that it might just come right back up. The only things that have tasted remotely good are smoothies, and in one instance, macaroni and cheese *gasp*. Not good.

I realized today, I don’t think I’ve fully connected with this pregnancy yet. I mean, I’m so grateful and excited – don’t get me wrong. We are so thrilled to be blessed with another child. But, I’m so distracted with my nausea, I feel like I don’t have much time to just enjoy myself and the thought of my new baby. You know what I mean?

There’s another thing getting me down. While experiencing this morning sickness, I find the task of homekeeping – cooking, cleaning, tending to laundry, taking care of Jack and spending quality time with Ryan – all very, very daunting. I know I’ll make it through but it’s possible that I could feel this way for 7 more weeks. I can’t imagine. I don’t know how I’ll do it, but I know I’ve got to do it. It’s a bit scary. I want to continue to be a good wife and mother. I don’t want to neglect my duties – they’re important to me.

Good news is, I’ve made a decision. I’m not going to wean Jack. I am fully committed to child-led weaning. I still believe in the statement, “If you resent it, change it,” but I am aware of the pros and cons of this decision and it’s very important to me to nurse Jack until he’s ready to stop. Despite the slight soreness, I find joy in nursing my boy. There are so many benefits and I just can’t wean him – not when I’m aware of the benefits of this long-term nursing relationship.

Well, this day has already flown by and I still need to clean and lanolize some soakers as well as fold mounds of laundry. Please, stomach, let me work!



Filed under homemaking, on being a mama, pregnancy

4 responses to “These Days

  1. I’m so sorry you’re going through that. Did you have it with Jack? I did with Suzi, and I don’t think I did a single dish the whole time. The smell of food put me over the edge, so Jordan was faced with all of it. I also worked full-time and had a 45-minute commute so by the time I got home all I wanted to do was go to bed. I am going to do a post soon on my favorite ways to cope with morning sickness–although you probably know them all already. Hope you feel better!

  2. Hey Rissa, congratulations by the way! How exciting for you guys. Just take it one day at a time and have grace for yourself. I will be praying that you feel better real soon though. I think it’s wonderful that you’re still nursing Jack. I nursed Caley into my 5th month of pregnancy with Hannah….. then my milk dried up, but everyone’s different. One thing I did while pregnant (which my kids now enjoy) and also helped with the connecting part was to write letters to the baby during the pregnancy. Just an idea though. I do hope you feel better soon and are able to enjoy this wonderful blessing.

  3. Lindsey

    Oh stink…I had that with this pregnancy. Not with my first though. NOTHING sounded good to eat. And I mean NOTHING. And the thought of cooking for Eli and John was misery! John did the dishes (we don’t have a dishwasher) while I couldn’t stomach the smells. And I just did what HAD to be done as far as house work…laundry, picking up clutter, vacuuming…but I didn’t do any deep cleaning because I was just SO tired. Especially when Eli would nap I HAD to in order to make it through the rest of my day and be able to function correctly!
    The bottom line is if you don’t rest when you need to, then you are no good to Jack or Ryan because you are so darn tired! (Hope that doesn’t sound rude…totally don’t mean you are no good…dang.) Have grace for yourself. God knew what he was doing when you got preggers! The 2nd trimester will be here before you know it and you’ll be a cleaning/organizing fool 🙂

    Hang in there! You are doing a great job!

  4. faemom

    I’ve been there. I get horrible morning sickness. The only thing I liked to eat was mash potatoes or scalloped potatoes. For now, just try doing the chores NEED to get done. In a few months, you’ll be able to eat and rest a little less and then go back to being your cheerful self. Besides if any one complians, suggest they help; you’re pregnant.

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