For the past week or so, I’ve been sleeping really terribly. I toss and turn, dream nonstop (at least that’s what it feels like!), and I find myself either freezing cold or deathly hot. I also noticed that I’d been extremely dizzy. Whether I was at the grocery store or standing in my living room, the sensation that the room was spinning was an all too familiar feeling. I was actually concerned that I had some kind of nutrient deficiency.
Then, today, this happened:
We are so thrilled! We feel so blessed and honored to receive this precious gift of life. God is so good!
Oh, and in case you’re wondering why the pregnancy test is sitting on top of a box… 🙂 I was at home with Jack when I decided to take the test. I wanted to call Ryan and tell him but I decided I should do something fun. I found a little box, stuffed it with tissue paper, and laid the test inside. I wrapped the box with gift wrap and tied a ribbon around it. Then, I drove down to Ryan’s work and handed him the “gift.” He was so surprised that I’d gotten him something! We talked a bit and he explained that he’d been having a hard day, so I encouraged him to open the present. Well, he did, and he just hugged me and cried and laughed and hugged me! It was so wonderful. I’m really glad I told him that way!
This pregnancy is really making me think. When I was on my way to tell Ryan, I started thinking about Psalm 139. I started thinking about how the Lord sees my baby’s unformed body. He already knows and loves this baby. How deeply intimate! Later this evening, I went online to check when I might be due, and I noticed a link saying, “Click here to read about what your baby looks like at 5 weeks.” So, I clicked it, even though I’d read so much about development when I was pregnant with Jack…and I was so overjoyed! For some reason, I feel like there’s more depth to my understanding of the true gift of pregnancy and motherhood now. I was struck by God’s “bigness.” My baby will be forming his internal organs for the next 5 weeks! In my belly!! What an amazing thing! And then, I look at Jack. My big, handsome, smartypants, babbling little boy. He was formed inside me, too. God put him together perfectly and has allowed Ryan and I to be the forever grateful parents of an awesome boy. Wow.
Ryan and I can’t express the depth of our gratefulness. Thank you, Lord!