Ramblings of a Busy Mind

I have a specific point to write about, but before I do that, I just HAVE to download my day with…you.

I’m SO excited because we are FINALLY getting settled into our apartment (I know, after four months, right?). Today, Ryan and I decided to FINALLY clean out the extra room. Up until today, we had hopes for it to become a music/guest/art room…and now those hopes are finally, mostly, reality. We disassembled that SILLY bulky corner desk from Ikea and replaced it with a normal, everyday small desk that looks SO much better. We moved one of our bookcases in here and actually organized all the books, and we set up the daybed/trundle! I can’t believe it. It actually LOOKS like a room….a room that I’d spend time in, for goodness’ sake! So, I’m happy. We’ve still got some organizing (or as I like to call it, “throwing away” 🙂 to do but for the most part, this room is up and running. I just need to get my easel and art supplies organized and set up, and I’ll be good to go. I guess this is also really exciting because yesterday, I organized Jack’s room (for the third and FINAL time 🙂 and it looks great. It’s clean and it’s roomy and it’s pleasant. I feel like I’m on a roll…! Thankfully our room was one of the first to get organized, and the common rooms are already pretty much there, as well. Wee! Now I just need to sew the darn curtains for all the rooms, and buy some paint! Does the work EVER end? 🙂

Now, onto the true point of my post. I have a dillema. And it’s not so much that I need help deciding what to do – it’s more like I need, 1, to feel okay about my decision, and 2, to not feel crazy that this is even a dillema for me. Let me explain.

My parents have a housecleaner named Sara. She’s a very kind, older Mexican woman who only speaks Spanish. Because of my time spent in Mexico and my somewhat fluent Spanish, Sara and I have a little bond going on. She’s always been very friendly to me, and I, in turn, have correctly translated the conversations between my mother and her. 🙂 Ever since she met Jack, she’s been so sweet to him, exposing him to his first (of many!) experiences with the Spanish language. We always give Sara all of our old clothes, and any household items of worth. If we neglect to give them to her and simply throw them out, she fishes them out of the trash and scolds us! She’s a very kind, lighthearted woman. I like her a lot!

Anyway, so here’s the problem. The other day, while she was cleaning at my parents, she approached me. “Do you live far from here?” she asked. “No,” I said, “I live about ten minutes away.” Sara smiled, then said, “Oh good, because I want to come and clean for you.” Flattered, of course, I said, “Well, thank you, but how much will it cost?” And she said, “Oh, no, no, it won’t cost anything! I’m going to clean your house for free!” She then went on to explain how she only has one house to clean in my city on Wednesdays, and she gets bored, and she wants more to do! I know what you’re thinking, because I was thinking it too…..”She wants MORE HOUSES to CLEAN? WHY?” Eventually, I came to the conclusion that she must just like to keep busy. Her children are grown…she just cleans. I asked her if I could eventually pay her and she replied with a firm “absolutely not.” So….there you go. There’s my problem.

You see, I can’t turn her down. I talked to Ryan to make sure it wouldn’t upset him. Besides that, I can’t think of any polite reason to say no. She’s cleaned my mom’s house for free a few times, and when we asked her why, she told us that she was reading her Bible one day and felt like it was the right thing to do. Sounds vague because it WAS vague. It insulted her when my mom tried to pay her anyway. She actually THREW the check back at my mom.

Part of me thinks, I’m only just getting used to cleaning this huge apartment and now I will have someone doing it for me (albeit once every other week)…isn’t that bad? I feel like maybe it’s wrong for me to accept help because I need to be doing it myself to somehow PROVE to myself (and any other opinionated person) that I’m a capable wife and mother. Then, the other part of me thinks and TRIES to accept that perhaps this is God simply blessing me. Perhaps, I’m entering into a new season and I’m supposed to graciously receive Sara’s cleaning as a gift from the Lord. I’m torn.

I don’t know what to do. She wouldn’t let me say no. So I gave her my address. But what if I can never make her stop cleaning? What if…she never goes away? I mean, like I said, I like her…but eventually I should clean my own house, right? This happened on Thursday and I’m still mulling it over in my head constantly. I just want to arrive at a conclusion about how I (should) feel about all this, and then have peace about it. Enough of this worrying!

So…any thoughts or encouraging words would be greatly appreciated!



Filed under homemaking, tea-timing

2 responses to “Ramblings of a Busy Mind

  1. Sunydazy

    I have to say that as God blesses you with more children you may really need her help! Maybe God is just sending you a blessing. Perhaps your friendship will deepen and you will be a mutual blessing. My parents used to love the phrase “Don’t rob me of a blessing” which was used to remind people that helping others or giving to them in any way also means blessings to the giver!
    It could be that it turns out to be only temporary ~perhaps circumstances will change~ but if not maybe you will find other ways to repay her for her kindness.
    And to answer your question~ No! You do not HAVE to clean your own house…you just need to MANAGE your own house. That means different things to every family. Re-read Proverbs 31 with out the American-I-can-do-it-all-myself–cultural lenses on…:-)
    Pray for wisdom and don’t be afraid to accept kindness!

  2. Katie

    Oh I like that other comment about managing. That is exactly it.

    I think that when other people want to bless us we should let them, because they get great joy from it – why would we take that from them?

    I love the opportunity to do something that I KNOW really blesses someone, the look on their face, the appreciation in their eyes is so worth it. I feel like I make out better than them 🙂

    It sounds to me that you feel like if you let her then you aren’t really doing your “job” as a homemaker. But Rissa – is there not work to do every other day of the week? 🙂 Help on one day does not cancel out all the other work you do during the week 🙂 And perhaps, when she’s at your house you could spend some of that time baking and send her home with some goodies 🙂

    I hope that when my children are grown I will have the opportunity to bless my own daughters and other young mom’s I know with help. As I know when you’re a new mom or mom with a couple little ones trying to learn how to juggle it all you need to know you aren’t alone, and aren’t the first to try to figure it all out!

    Love ya!

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